While browsing through Amazon's newly released book selection for my Kindle, I came across a book called Heaven is For Real. Intrigued, I quickly downloaded it and began to read. Before I give you my thoughts on this quick and non-fictional read, I will pleasure you with a little of my background which is what sparked this blog in this first place.
I was not raised in a very religious family...believers yes, worshipers no. From a very young age I have had extreme anxiety over death and what comes after. Because I was not baptized I have had the freedom to learn and decide what I will choose yet I have struggled with committing to any religion based on the hypocrisies I have encountered, the judgmental people, and the inconsistencies among the varying religions. I appreciate that I was not forced into a religion as a child and that I get to make my own decision. There are periods in my life where I am completely content with not being baptized and not attending a regular service. I have always considered myself a spiritual person. I have been given a unique gift that lets me see dreams that mimic the future, be extra sensitive to souls around me, and experience positive aberrations. [On a side note, I was once told I was working with the devil by a devout Catholic because of these things that I experience.] Eliminating that choice was easily done right then and there. [On another side note, I have been told on numerous occasions by members of the LDS faith that I would never be accepted into Heaven because of these experiences and the fact that I had pre-marital sex etc. Funny how I am still with this person in a very healthy relationship, my one and only.] Made eliminating that choice an easy one. To get back on track, I am just trying to say that I do believe in something above us, I have faith, and believe that unique gifts i have been given are for a purpose and a positive one. I do feel like my prayers are answered and that I have a spirit guide guiding my way, but for some reason I still feel stuck. I am not 100% content that I am unsure about religion, baptism or what may come. And if you ask my husband what he thinks, minus the dreams, he will tell the same story I just did.
So back to my point, I read this true story and have to say that I was completely blown away by what this 4 year old had experienced in his 3 minutes of Heaven. His details were remarkable and things that a four year old would never understand or know were being discussed with precision. For most religious folk they would think, "What an uplifting read; totally assures me of my beliefs." However, for me I am perplexed. I am left feeling extremely vulnerable and naive about actually feeling like I want to march right down to my local church in my Sunday best and attend regularly. How can one book about what a four year old experienced sway me? I feel stupid almost. The Bible does not have this effect on me. To me it is a story that has been lost in translation and is not meant to be literal. It's years upon historical years have no effect on me either. Why? But this one little silly book does?
So here is my question for all of you of any faith, if you managed to stay awake through all that. Can you really make your mind up about something as important as religion after reading one account of someones experience? Is this story simply a ploy to attract vulnerable people like myself? Is there something wrong with just wanting to be an agnostic believer with faith who leads a good life with morale? Or will I forever be stuck?
***In no way shape or form do I have anything against the Catholic or LDS faith...These are just true accounts of my life thus far that have somewhat shaped my beliefs. I also know that not all members of these faiths feel the same way as the certain members I spoke above about. I have respect for all people and all religions and in fact love that people believe in something that only sparks positivity and good will.
